I think it’s because of our increasingly shorter attention spans. In most cases, to write a blog entry I have to first have an idea or concept and then try to spend some time crafting some type of prose around that idea. That takes time and energy and while I certainly enjoy the process, I don’t always have the luxury of time or energy.
Then along comes Facebook, with the opportunity not only to jot down your own witty and pithy comments via status messages, but also view those of your friends. Of course, the witty and pithy quality of many of your friends’ statuses is questionable. “Just took the dog for a walk” is ridiculous – unless you’re talking about a yo-yo.
I haven’t explored Twitter yet but don’t think I’ll like it. At least Facebook gives you more than just the status messages. Some of my friends do post interesting links, notes and pictures. And as much as I love and respect my 17-year old nephew, this peek into his world, his friends and their goings-on sometimes makes me wonder if I was ever that inhibited in my younger days.
So here I am, writing a blog entry about Facebook. And not just about Facebook, but about my status messages. You see, I think I’ve become a bit more sophisticated about these things since I’ve started using it and also reading the status messages of some of my funnier friends. My favorites are by Joe Dator, but then he’s a professional humorist so I expect nothing less. Here then, is a sampling of those little messages forcibly written in the third person. Enjoy!
- Matthew is trying to remember if the Talmud instructs us to eat Chinese food on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day.
- Matthew wants to be taken to Funkytown.
- Matthew can't decide whether he wants to be the eggman or the walrus.
- Matthew is doing the Locomotion.
- Matthew shot the sheriff but he did not shoot the deputy.
- Matthew is calling Ghostbusters.
- Matthew thinks that while comedians may be disappointed that Dubbya is gone, they should be thankful for Rod Blagojevich.
- Matthew thinks it a bit strange that Facebook statuses are told in the third-person. Matthew thinks this is rather like a particular Seinfeld episode.
- Matthew can't wait to get stimulated by the Federal government.
- Matthew thinks that the golden age of rock 'n roll was when bands were named after places (e.g. Chicago, Boston, Kansas).
- Matthew is happy that the official start of spring has arrived - The Allman Brothers start their annual 3-week gig at The Beacon tonight.
- Matthew is having lunch today with Zero Mostel's nephew.
- Matthew just had 17 kids in the house for Sam's birthday party. Now where's that bottle of Scotch?
- Matthew remembers better days when referring to "Bernie" meant Williams of the Yankees and not Madoff.
- Matthew saw a down & out kinda guy on the street today holding a sign that said "Please give me money for beer, drugs and a hooker (at least I'm not bullshitting you)."
